How do you show your spouse how much you love him/her? There are a variety of ways people show their love to others. There are also differences in what makes people feel loved. Learning to recognize how you show love to your partner and what makes your partner feel loved can help you communicate your feelings much more effectively.
Some people feel loved when they receive gifts. For other people, a gift does not mean much. For example, one wife who receives flowers may think, “Wow, my husband thinks about me during the day while we are apart, which means he cares very much about me.” Another woman who receives flowers may think, “Why does he think sending flowers will make up for the time he doesn’t spend with me?”
Gifts for holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries are important to some people and not important at all to others. Even if gifts are not important to you, do what is important for your partner. If he/she appreciates gifts a lot, then keep this in mind. Gifts don’t have to be expensive, but they can certainly show you put thought into them.
Some people feel loved when his/her spouse shows physical affection. For other people, cuddling or holding hands is just not all that interesting. Be aware of what your partner likes and dislikes and try to accommodate their need for affection at times. It’s also important to let your needs be known.
For many people, time is the important way to show love. However, some people feel the most loved when their partner is completing a task for them. For example, a husband may feel the most loved when his wife spends an hour cooking his favorite meal. Another person may only feel loved if their spouse is in the same room spending time together.
Communicate with your partner what sorts of things make you feel the most loved. If your needs are not known, your partner may misunderstand and feel frustrated by your lack of response. Keep in mind that what makes you feel the most loved may not be the same things that makes your partner feel loved.