Many people seem to settle for a mediocre marriage. It isn’t bad, but it isn’t great. Some describe it as comfortable. They recognize that it would never be considered one of the “greatest loves of all time” and they are okay with that.
Having a lukewarm marriage isn’t all that fulfilling. It becomes more like having a roommate. Or a business partner who lives in the house. There’s no passion. The excitement is gone. And it certainly isn’t satisfying and fun.
Why do people settle for a mediocre marriage? Some people are afraid that this is as good as it is going to get. They’ve just resigned themselves to a marriage that is convenient yet not exhilarating.
Others think that perhaps they married the wrong person but don’t want to bother to make a change or get divorced. They’ll just stay because it’s comfortable. It’s just something that is to be endured and they go through the motions day in and day out.
Yet other people are fearful that they don’t deserve a happy marriage. Perhaps they sabotage all areas of their life that could lead to happiness. People may punish themselves or prevent themselves from reaching their full potential due to mental health issues, a trauma history or unresolved childhood issues.
What’s wrong with having just a mediocre marriage? Mediocre marriages are just one or two steps away from disaster at all times. Sometimes people grow bored and turn to others to meet their physical or emotional needs. Also, people in mediocre marriages may struggle to get their needs met.
Love is one of the greatest things about life. When someone experiences a great marriage, they can fully experience some of life’s greatest joys. There are plenty of single people who are able to experience joy without a partner. However, if you got married, you probably entered into the marriage because you weren’t experiencing these joys as a single person.
Ask yourself, how would your life be different if your marriage were great? What is getting in the way of making your marriage a great one? What are you willing to do about it? Marriage counseling or individual counseling can help you overcome barriers that are preventing you from having the type of marriage you would like to have.