How much do you trust that your spouse can make good decisions? Do you ever worry that in your absence, your spouse will not make good decisions? Do you tend to argue about the choices your spouse has made? If you don’t trust that your partner can make good decisions, it is important to examine why not.
Think about how your partner handles situations related to business, money, taking care of household tasks, and parenting. How much do you value his opinion when it comes to making decisions? Do you trust that he can handle things on his own? When you aren’t home, do you call to remind him what do do or check in to make sure he’s still on track?
If you don’t trust your partner’s decision-making skills, there are two possibilities. One possibility is that he makes bad choices. Perhaps he sends the kids out to play unsupervised for hours at a time and the kids are in danger. Or maybe when you aren’t with him at the store, he makes expensive impulsive purchases when you don’t have the money to pay for them.
The other possibility of why you struggle to trust your spouse’s decision making might be that you have difficulty accepting that another opinion is just as valid as your opinion. Perhaps you dislike the fact that he takes the children fishing and they miss nap time. Or maybe you disagree with his ability to shop without extensively comparison shopping prices first. Yet, his behaviors are not harmful to the children or detrimental to the family, just different from your choices.
If your spouse has exhibited behaviors that place your family in physical danger, financial peril, or other safety risks on a repeated basis, you probably have reason to have legitimate concern. If this is the case, hopefully you have discussed it and are receiving treatment to work on this issue. However, if you just struggle to deal with your spouse’s opinions, consider learning how to be more open-minded to your spouse’s choices.
There is more than one right way to do things. There are many ways to parent children, to manage money and to complete household tasks. There are pros and cons to various approaches, but it is likely that your partner’s approach has benefits that your approach may not.