Archive for August, 2011

Our Pasts, Our Decisions, and ADHD

You go visit your family or friends.  You all start talking about the past or the recent present.  Someone tells you new information about what happened regarding you.  It may be a fact or an insight into who they think you are.  All of a sudden you think you have to reevaluate everything.  You feel […]

Passive-Aggressive Behaviors in the Marriage

Are you guilty of behaving in a passive-aggressive manner in your relationship? When people are passive-aggressive they tend to outwardly appear like they agree or are “going with the flow.” However, they secretly may be very hostile or may try to sabotage the outcome. Behaving in a passive-aggressive manner does not benefit anyone. It can […]

Does Making a Change Feel Awkward?

Sometimes trying something new feels awkward, especially at first. Fear of embarrassing yourself may prevent you from doing something different. No one likes to feel awkward and many people avoid doing anything that would make them feel this way. However, it can be easy to get stuck in a marital rut and without making changes […]

Is Your Pet Ruling Your Life?

We all love our pets.  We would do anything for them. They are our companions and love objects.  We often give them the care we should give ourselves.  Yet we might be giving them too much attention and they may be running our lives too much. A few examples should help clarify the situation. The […]

Asking For What You Want

Are you able to ask for what you want from your partner? Many people have difficulty asking for what they want or need from their partner. It is important to look at the underlying reasons that cause you to have difficulty asking for what you want. Do you think you shouldn’t have to ask? Do you […]

Juggling Marriage and Life’s Other Responsibilities

In today’s age, many couples have two-income families. Juggling two careers along with kids and household responsibilities can be difficult. Some people even experience extra stressors such as having to care for elderly parents an can add even more difficulty to juggling responsibilities. So how do you juggle everything? One important factor is to not expect […]

Don’t Wait to See A Therapist—Your Kids—Part 3

My previous two posts said that you shouldn’t wait to see a therapist if you’re having problems and if you and your partner are having problems.  I strongly said that you don’t want the situation to get worse and create new problems. I want to talk about the kids now. (And, by the way, don’t […]

Don’t Wait To See A Therapist, Part 2: You and Your Partner

I wrote in an earlier post that it’s better not to wait when something is going wrong in your life and/or your relationship.  I suggested that you see a therapist to help you sort things out.  Now I’m suggesting you bring your partner into joint therapy and suggest your partner go to her/his own therapy […]

Don’t Wait to See A Therapist, Part 1: You

A possible new client called me recently.  She desperately needed to see someone.  In between sobbing, she said she should have seen someone six months ago.  When I saw her, I agreed.  Here’s why, and why you shouldn’t wait. If you have a serious problem and you’re not able to handle it, you need help.  […]

Are you Able to Express Your Anger Effectively?

When people feel angry, they have to decide whether or not to express their anger to their partner immediately. Some people decide to hold in their angry feelings as long as they can, but then it explodes. Other people immediately let their anger be known. It is important to be able to communicate with your […]

Determining Your Priorities

Where in the list of your life’s priorities is your relationship? It is often an interesting exercise for couples to separately create their list of their top five priorities. Then compare to see where they differ on priorities and which priorities are the same. Where does your job come in on the list of life’s priorities? […]

What’s One Thing I Can Do Today To Improve My Marriage?

What if everyone woke up everyday and asked themselves, “What’s one thing I can do today to improve my marriage?” The divorce rate would likely be lower and people would probably report higher rates of satisfaction in their relationships. Unfortunately, most people don’t focus on finding one thing they can do to improve their relationship. […]

So Your Child is LGBT…

You have just welcomed this beautiful new baby into your life and look forward to its growing up with you. As s/he starts to develop, you’re puzzled by her/his behavior and, sometimes, by the way s/he looks.  You see yourself as a modern parent who believes all children are born innocent.  What should you do? […]