Archive for October, 2011


Enjoying One Another’s Company

Are you able to sit with your partner without doing anything at all? Can you shut off the television, computer and phone and just sit and be together? Many couples find it difficult to just be together with each other. Do you and your spouse often invite friends or other family members to join you […]

Lack of Sexual Desire

Lack of sexual desire can be caused by several different factors. Physical health problems, mental health problems, and substance abuse are some of the most common reasons people lack sexual sexual desire. Lack of sexual desire can be very damaging to a marriage so it is important to explore what the causes may be. Some […]

The Dangers of Destructive Arguments

When arguments become destructive, they are very dangerous to the relationship. The way people argue tells a lot about their relationship and can predict the outcome of the marriage. Although many people who have heated arguments don’t end up in divorce, a pattern of destructive arguments can lead to irreversible damage. Destructive arguments mean that […]

Differences in the Male and Female Brain

Scientists have discovered that there are differences in the male and female brain. There are differences in the way men and women process information and engage in problem solving. It’s helpful for people to recognize these differences as it can help explain some of those reasons for your partner’s behaviors. Men and women process emotional […]

The Difference Between Anger and Aggression

Anger is a feeling. Aggression is a behavior. However, often the two get confused. At other times people use their anger as an excuse to behave in an aggressive manner. Anger is an acceptable emotion just like happiness or sadness. Everyone feels angry sometimes. However, many people deny that they ever feel angry. For others, […]

How Anger and Resentment Can Cause Sexual Problems

When people become dissatisfied with the relationship and they don’t address their frustrations, resentment can build. This resentment can quickly turn to anger. When people become angry and resentful, it creates a new set of problems for the marriage. When people feel angry and resentful, the last thing they often want to do is engage […]

Using Anger to Control Your Partner

Sometimes people use their anger as a tool to control their partner. Aggressive behaviors may include things such as threats, name calling, and throwing things. Aggression may include other forms of intimidation such as a look that is meant to control the other person. Aggression can become both physically and emotionally abusive. It may be […]

Agree to Go to Bed at the Same Time

There are many theories about sleep and dreams but there’s still a lot of mystery around this topic for psychologists. What we do know for sure is that finding time to reconnect at the end of each day is an easy way to stay connected and increase your intimacy. For some couples, the few minutes […]

How Does a Bad Temper Hurt the Marriage?

A bad temper can be toxic to many relationships, especially a marriage. It can cause a variety of problems for both partners. A bad temper can be a bad habit and without appropriate anger management skills, it can lead to a marriage dissolving. People who have a bad temper often “explode.” They may yell, scream, […]

Keep Your Sense of Humor

Couples who laugh together often report more positive feelings toward their partner. Humor can actually be quite intimate. Sharing a personal joke together can often make two people feel more connected than ever. When was the last time you and your partner shared a good laugh together? Sometimes life gets serious and people stop laughing. […]

How To Deal With Your Unemployed Partner-part 2

So, let’s talk about what you can do to help your partner get through this period of unemployment. As noted in the previous post, you’ve gotten a sense of possibilities.  Make a plan with different degrees of urgency.  That means that you or your partner may have to leave for a while to find work.  […]

How To Deal With Your Unemployed Partner-part 1

Your partner is unemployed. Perhaps s/he has just lost their job or has been downsized. S/he is depressed, anxious, and at loose ends. You both feel exhausted and at dead ends.  Are there actions that you can take to help her or him?  This will be a two-part  post. Here are a few suggestions. Before […]

Learn to Recognize Physical Symptoms of Anger

Sometimes people report that their anger goes from zero to ten in an instant. When people say this, it is usually because they do not recognize the warning signs that their anger is on the rise. Learning how to recognize when you are becoming angry can help you to make better decisions about how to […]

Finding Purpose Together

Having a sense of purpose together can be a powerful way to grow your relationship. Working together can provide you with a sense of accomplishment. It can also remind you that the two of you are a team and that when you work together, you can get things done. For many couples, the goal is […]

The Importance of Giving Compliments

Giving compliments to your spouse is an important part of having a healthy relationship. Many couples compliment one another early on. While they are dating, they offer frequent affirmations and compliments galore. But then, after a few years, those can start to dissipate. When was the last time you commented on your spouse’s beauty in […]

Be Open to New Ideas and New Experiences

It’s important to be open to new ideas, new experiences and new adventures during your marriage. If your spouse suggests trying something new, be open minded about it. Trying new things can help you grow together as a couple. People who feel bored with life often make boring partners. Boredom can be a big problem […]

Accept That Arguments Will Happen

Disagreement in a marriage is inevitable. It’s okay and healthy to disagree on things. If you always agreed on everything, there wouldn’t be much sense in having a mate. Some people fear conflict and avoid arguments at all costs. Accepting that arguments are inevitable can be a healthy part of a marriage. Arguing isn’t a […]

Your Partner Is Passionate About Something And You’re Not

There’s this couple. She sings  in a chorus and he’s a manic baseball fan. She travels around the world with her group and he is a walking encyclopedia of his team.  Can this relationship be saved?  Here are some ideas. The questions you need to ask are in no particular order.  First, ask yourself: Do […]

Raising Your Voice at Your Spouse

When an argument becomes heated, do you ever raise your voice? Many people do, but it’s not helpful or healthy. It is important to identify the reason you raise your voice and to learn new techniques that can help you communicate more effectively. Some people raise their voice because they are talking over their partner. […]

Preventing the Relationship From Eroding Away

When a marriage ends, it doesn’t come to an abrupt, sudden end. Instead, the relationship tends to slowly erode. At some point, one or both of the people in the relationship recognize that this erosion has occurred and the relationship may come to an end. It is important to prevent this erosion from slowly and subtly […]