Do you trust in your partner’s parenting skills? When you aren’t home do you feel secure in your partner doing a good job with the children? Or do you worry that your partner doesn’t do as good of a job as you do?
It’s imperative for the health of your marriage as well as for your children’s health that you and your partner have complete trust in each other’s parenting skills. Women often feel like they do a better job parenting. This can lead them to treat their husbands more like another child.
If you don’t trust in your partner’s ability to parent the children well, there’s one of two possible scenarios. One is that your partner isn’t very involved with the children and actually doesn’t do a good job. This might lead the other person to constantly remind their spouse of things like, “Remember, she needs to have her bottle by 8:00.” If this is the case, it’s likely that your partner isn’t involved enough in parenting.
Work, family obligations, and hobbies can sometimes make one parent less active in the lives of their children. If your spouse isn’t very involved, it’s imperative that you take action in order to address the marital and family problems that are likely to emerge (if they haven’t already). Discuss your concerns with your partner and address any issues that can be resolved to increase your partner’s participation.
The other scenario is that your partner does just fine with the children, but you don’t agree with your partner’s parenting style. This can cause parents to become divided when it comes to setting rules and enforcing consequences. It’s likely to lead to treating the other parent more like an adolescent. For example, saying, “Remember, the kids need to go to bed at 8:00. Don’t let them eat any junk food.” When this is the case, it breaks down the partnership of the marriage.
Parenting is stressful enough when both partners are on the same page. When they aren’t compatible with their parenting, it can have an enormous impact on the marriage. It is important to seek help for your marriage if you and your partner are struggling to parent the children together. It is important for your children to have two parents who agree on basic parenting issues.