The Marriage Counseling Blog

Giving compliments to your spouse is an important part of having a healthy relationship. Many couples compliment one another early on. While they are dating, they offer frequent affirmations and compliments galore. But then, after a few years, those can start to dissipate.

When was the last time you commented on your spouse’s beauty in some way, shape or form? It’s important for your spouse to know that you find her attractive. Reminding her that she’s beautiful on the inside and out can help improve her self-confidence.

Tell your spouse something you appreciate about her and try to do so everyday. Find small things to comment on, such as how she responded to a particular situation. Also, point out the bigger picture. Tell her you appreciate how she behaves as a wife, as a mother, or as a member of your community. Showing your gratitude for all that she does on a daily basis can go a long way.

Compliments can be given in other ways, other than just verbally. Consider writing her a note. Place a sticky note on her mirror, put a note in her lunch, or leave a note on her computer. Also, write her a love letter where you tell her how much you enjoy being her spouse.

Physical affection can be another great way to show your appreciation. Offer a hug for no reason other than to show your appreciation. Hold your spouse’s hand and offer a kiss. Physical affection can be very reaffirming to your spouse. For many couples, physical affection decreases once they have children and as the years pass their physical affection continues to decrease.

Showing your appreciation to your spouse can help your partner feel supported, loved, and validated. The world can be a tough place and having a supportive spouse who cheers you on and appreciates you can go a long way. Practice giving sincere compliments to your spouse. It can feel awkward at first if you aren’t used to it, but it can make a big difference in your marriage.