Sometimes the demands of bills, work, and children can take a toll on the romance in a marriage. Making sure your bedroom is a romantic retreat to escape all the stressors of everyday life can be helpful to the health of your marriage, including your sexual intimacy. A few simple steps can help ensure that your bedroom helps fuel the romance.
Set Boundaries with Kids
If your kids sleep in your bed, it is going to put a damper on your sex life. There’s no way around it. If you have gotten into the habit of allowing kids to sleep in your bed, start working on getting them back into their own rooms at night. Although they are likely to protest initially, with some extra effort, you can help them start sleeping in their beds again.
Be prepared for resistance and consider starting a new routine on a night when you don’t have to get up early the following day. Tantrums or frequent attempts to crawl into your bed are likely. But don’t give in! If you give in, you will sabotage all of your efforts. Ignore crying and tantrums and walk your child back to his room if he comes out. Consider using a reward system, like a sticker chart, to increase his motivation to stay in his own bed. It is important for children to learn to get to sleep on their own by soothing themselves at night.
Also, teach children the importance of privacy. Teach them to knock on your bedroom door when it is closed and explain the importance of waiting until you tell them to come in. Teaching this to children when they are young will make it a habit that’s easy for them to follow.
Set Boundaries with Pets
Another way to kill the romance is to have Fido in bed with you. If you prefer to have the dog or cat sleep in your room, set some boundaries. The pet will survive without sleeping in your bed all the time. Consider creating a bed for the pet on the floor. And just like with the kids, it’s okay to shut the door and not let them in sometimes too!
Be Mindful of Activities you do in the Bedroom
Sometimes people pay bills in bed. Then the bed becomes associated with finances, which isn’t likely going to spark any romance. Be mindful of the activities you are doing in the bedroom. Avoid conducting business in the bedroom. Using your cell phone or laptop can make the bedroom seem more like it is a place to work rather than rest. Reserve your bed for sleeping and sexual activity. This can help you with your sleep habits as well as provide some extra opportunities for romance.
Make Changes to your Bedroom
Sometimes when couples fix up a home, their bedroom is the last room to be addressed. If your room is in need of some updating or cosmetic changes, make it a priority to fix it up. The bedroom is a very important room! The ambiance will set the tone for the mood of the room. And peeling wallpaper, outdated curtains, and a shabby floor are not going to ignite the romance.
If you aren’t able to afford money or time to do a bedroom make-over, try some inexpensive ways to improve the look of the room. Rearrange the furniture, de-clutter, and organize the room in a way that is appealing. An inexpensive comforter or simple curtain change can make a big difference. Replacing worn out sheets with new ones can make the bed more inviting as well.
Most importantly, make sure the bedroom is clean! Stepping over children’s toys or large heaps of clothing isn’t likely going to help you in the romance department. However, a clean room can spark some feelings of peace and serenity. It can help you to feel more relaxed which can allow for more romance.
The Importance of Having a Romantic Retreat
In a busy world, it is important to have a space that you and your spouse can share together to help you escape the stress of the world. It can improve your marriage by helping increase your physical and emotional intimacy. It can also help you to put a higher priority on spending quality time together as a couple.